Young Underpaid Professionals

I’ll admit, I thought I was all set for Valentine’s Day with the Rom-Com and Classics post but as random brain farts don’t usually follow a schedule, I’ll write this down now so my brain can get over what my friend Lei calls Barfintimes Day. Despite popular belief, Valentine’s Day isn’t only for lovers; it’s for singles too. It’s that time of the year when the phrase “singled out” takes a whole new different meaning. Attached friends look upon you with pity, and whatever you say can and will be taken against you and translated as bitterness. People like me however, delight in the communal misery as it is so much better than the “just you” kind of misery which ironically, can come with breaking up.

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In light of the coming Hallmark-inspired non-holiday, I’ve busted out several sappy DVDs for a special singleton Valentine movie marathon. For the purposes of this marathon, I’ve decided to divide my viewing equally between the Rom-Com movies (romantic comedies) and the Classics. Arguably, the Rom-Com movies I have lined up can also be considered classics in their own right, but let’s not get into semantics.

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I remember that super flash fiction activity we had back in the hell hole, the 50-word story (Note: If the title of the activity wasn’t self-explanatory for you, you can see mine and Rica’s submissions for the said activity here and here.], and I realized that most of the people I know do it on a daily basis – in status messages. Most status messages in Facebook or YM (or Twitter, let’s not get into that) give me ulcer, but some of my more enlightened (and grammatically adept) friends have the most amusing things to say in 140 words or less.

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Here’s the first part of the Yuppie Guide, the series where you’ll see your extra income options and weigh them accordingly. By this time, you should know that it takes real work to get from Point A (where you are right now) to Point B (where you want to be, preferably retired by 50) and there is some amount of risk with each option. For the first option we have, there is minimal risk and the only capital you’ll need is time and effort. It’s part-time work, people.

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The title says it all and I know, I know, it’s incredibly ambitious. As yuppies (young underpaid professionals) it takes a certain amount of ambition to get to where you ultimately want to be. I’m sure most of you are wondering what “conquering the universe” means, and we’ll explore that in this series of articles. You see, I’ve interviewed a couple of young NOT-underpaid professionals and I’ve learned a thing or two about their world domination plans.

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Yesterday, “official” campaign period for national positions started and for those of you who thought it started in November, apparently, plastering your face on TV ads don’t count as campaigning. As long as they don’t say “Vote for President” right?

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We’re back and as you may have guessed (If you need a recap, click here), I was buried in work by Tuesday and didn’t manage to update until today. I grossly miscalculated on my ability to be an article factory like the old days; I didn’t put into consideration what might happen during my transition from being a total lazy ass to an industrious chinchilla. Imagine it: somebody who’s been lying around the house for a year suddenly gets taken to a labor concentration camp. Wait, that’s a bad image.

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Whew. Day One of World Domination has come to a close – yep, at 2AM. Entirely my fault actually, since my crazy insomnia prevented me from sleeping last night, then I finally lost consciousness at around 11AM and rose from the dead at 6PM. I have insane sleeping habits, what can I say? We did agree on work hours (I picked 10AM-6PM while the Overlord decided on 1PM-sawa), but seeing as I technically slept through my entire work day, I had to make up for the hours lost and so here we are.

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In the past four or so years, I’ve learned the importance of keywords. With keywords, you can get indexed in Google, thereby be found more often and grab the attention of readers. After years of practice, I’ve found that the only keyword that will get my friends really excited (no, not “Sony is dead”) is a four-letter word: Lobo.

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Last Friday, the Triumvirate of Evil (Rica, the Overlord and me) met for the first time in two years. We were supposed to meet earlier than that for our annual Evil Cooking Special, but the best laid plans usually are the most susceptible to failure. So anyway, we finally met and discussed a new world domination campaign the Overlord has planned for us; the first phase of which will start tomorrow.

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I was having a particularly merciless bout of insomnia and so I tried to keep my nighttime activities as inane as possible to bore myself to sleep. I read a boring book I have been trying to finish since 2008. No dice (no luck finishing the book either, I found my mind wandering to cheerier places at every paragraph). I stared at the ceiling until the agiw annoyed me; it was 5:37 AM, the birds were chirping outside, and it won’t be long before the neighbor nearest my window started belting out his shower concert (While I am all for cultivating a healthy imagination, I must point out that imagining yourself to have a good singing voice has cost a number of people their lives in unfortunate karaoke bar incidents, but I digress). And so I did the unthinkable and decided to clean up my cell phone inbox.

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