Yuppie Journals: Updates at last!
Well, as much as I’d like to say that the reason for us not being able to update earlier was because we’ve been terribly busy, I’d have to admit that I was being lazy. An incredible indolence had possessed me and as of this writing, it’s still clinging persistently onto my back. I haven’t been half as productive as I was during the first week and if you’ve ever tried risking anything in your life before, you’d know the feeling I’m about to describe. It’s the uneasy sloshing in the stomach that you can’t throw up, the solidifying trepidation in your bones you can’t shake off that comes only when you first glimpse Failure rearing its ugly head in the horizon before you.
Failure is that way, I guess. The mere sight, the mere notion of Failure will cause you to distrust the best crafted plans, to question the soundness of your judgment, and ultimately, to doubt yourself. That’s the purpose of Failure, to scare you shitless enough that you’re bound to head for the hills when given the slightest opportunity again. Oops, sorry, I didn’t mean to spout purplish prose on you, but I’m sure you get what I mean. (I realize that this paragraph is highly toxic and indulgent, but bear with me.)
So anyway, where was I? The first hurdle in the plans for world domination has come upon us during the time we were not paying attention. It was a series of hurdles actually, and they were by no measure easy. They were far more spectacular than the fails in Day Four, anyway.
- A service we were using had turned out to be completely unreliable (I’m being kind, it was completely useless), and upon issuing a complaint to the guy who sold me the service, all I got was a bitchy retort questioning my expectations of the product. Maybe he was having his period, I don’t know, but after I counted to 5, breathed in and out slowly, and wished he’d grow an ass on his face (silently, because we were still using the damned thing), I told him to forget it.
- Summer came on early, and along with it came El Niño. If you don’t live in a tropical country or aren’t located within a hundred miles of the equator, it feels like somebody hurled gasoline on you and then lit you up. Half the time, you imagine your brain is withering into a dried up husk and the other half, a heavy indolence comes upon you and you wish you’re either sleeping or soaked in a tub.
- Distractions were many, and morale was low. As explained in reason one, the weak link proved to be the service we were relying heavily upon to work and thus World Domination Plan A crumbled into tiny little mud blocks. The sudden switch to Plan B loosened the gears in my baked brain and quite suddenly it refused to work properly. The indolence had caught up with it and it very defiantly refused to spark up even the remotest interest in the things I was supposed to write about. It even lost interest in the things I wasn’t supposed to write about. In the end, I found I had to bribe it with books (seven, if you want to know) to get it going again.
- We realized we needed a Fourth. The Triumvirate of Evil wouldn’t be a triumvirate with a fourth wheel attached to it but as it was, the three wheels weren’t going so hot either. Rica’s busy with work, while I was busy imagining my brain frying in a pan and about to be served with fava beans and a nice Chianti, and The Overlord was getting overworked. Also, while all of that was happening, Despair decided to butt into our little world domination party and along with it came Pressure. Honestly, I like Pressure when it applies itself just right because it’s all that kept me from blundering through my entire life. I don’t like Despair much though, I find him all too mopey for my tastes.
So there. The failures have come and I think at this point there really is nothing else to do other than pick ourselves up or start heading for the hills. If you thought for a second we were going for the latter option, you’re reading the wrong blog.
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